Dad can’t cook!

My dad sings like a pop star
And he can speak in French and Dutch,
He can dig and weed the garden
Though he doesn’t do it much,
He can make himself go cross-eyed,
Touch his nose with the tip of his tongue,
But when he tries to cook a meal
It goes very, very wrong!

My dad can juggle oranges
And can climb and swing through trees,
He can jump across our garden pond
With most impressive ease,
He can help me with my homework
When I’m well and truly stuck,
But don’t let him cook dinner because
DAD CAN’T COOK!